Hi everyone. I’m going to start making a series of posts based off my Identifying Triggers tool, each post will show the process I go through to identify, explore, and debunk a new ‘Trigger’. A trigger is any thought, feeling, image, or memory that causes you to want to look at porn. This tool is based off a behavior modification technique called cognitive behavioral therapy, and is a very powerful means to transform our addiction in a mindful and compassionate way. I hope this will be helpful for you. 🙂

This week: Happiness without porn?

Emotions: Bored, stressed, tired, frustrated

Triggers: “I’m so depressed, life is so boring. Why can’t we look at porn? How can I survive? Come on, we should go look at some porn to feel better. You’ll feel better with some porn. What do you mean we have to stop forever? I can’t get rid of this feeling without porn. I can’t live without porn.”

Main Trigger: “I will never be happy again without porn.”

Alternative Thought: I can certainly be happy and enjoy life without porn because I have memories of being happy that do not involve porn. There are many other things in my life that relief my depression and boredom. Things like playing sports, BBQs with friends, making love to my SO, painting, playing guitar, exercising, meditation, and non of these involve porn. I can choose any of these over porn at any time. Porn does not have a monopoly over my happiness.

Furthermore, porn actually does the opposite. Yes, it may bring some happiness in the short term, but in the long term it actually brings me more suffering. Looking at porn will only ruin my chances at recovery and sabotage any efforts to enhance my personal life and relationships, which is what will being me true and rich happiness.